The First Day

You walk into the freshly cleaned room and the feeling of butterflies (or nausea) is almost overwhelming.
People walk by that you can barely say hello to because you don't know them. The number of "those" people causes the flood of loneliness to wash over you with the gut wrenching worry that you will never know these people.
The atmosphere is unfamiliar, uncertain, scary. You hold onto the things that comfort you the most whether they are thoughts, advice, an actual item, or people. These items become your security blanket for the next... who knows how long, until you feel safe enough to peek out from the corner.

I've felt like this on the first day of kindergarten, Jr. High, High school, and nearly every semester at college. I also felt like this when Aaron and I moved to Maryland and I feel it now as we embark on the next stage of our journey in California. If you asked me three years ago if I would make such good friends and actually miss it, I might have laughed in your face. Now, I know better. Now I know that you can truly have a family away from family. I miss our friends and I miss my family, doubly sore. However, I hold onto my two security blankets (Aaron and Eli) and I know that we are an eternal family who can brave this storm until we expand our family of friends with those we love here. I draw comfort from the fact that the church will be wherever we go and that it is an automatic social network. Then when we move again, I'll be triple sore and so on. Life never gets easier, does it?

Well, now we just have to wait for the movers. Who wants to guess at when they will get here (tomorrow through next week)?