"Rules of the Day"

It's no secret that I get REALLY frustrated with Eli.  It probably should be more secret.  I need to be more positive about my child and our relationship.  However, what's done is done and hopefully I can turn it around by hopefully giving hope to others who might feel that they are experiencing the same troubles.  A family therapist, in my ward, recommended his favorite parenting book.  It's called, "The Power of Positive Parenting."  Be warned that it is basically a text book, but it's also so much more!  For me, it's been a source of hope and gives some great advice that I can DO to be a better mom.  The reading I did yesterday gave four "Rules of the Day" that should be followed EVERY day! (The Italicized comments are my own personal comments).

1- Catch every member of your family doing something right, appropriate, or pleasant (adults as well as children). When you are constantly looking for and exposing the good, the negative will fade into the background or disappear all together.  

2- Each day have an appropriate, positive physical interaction with your children and spouse.  Hugs, kisses, tickles, wrestling, pats on the back, etc.  The author says that his daughter had a sign that read, "four hugs per day for survival, eight hugs for maintenance and twelve hugs for growth."  I LOVE that sign!  I can give hugs! 

3- Never say degrading or demeaning things to your children or spouse.  My dad taught us that objects can be fixed or replaced but what we say can NEVER be taken back.  The author repeats over and over that unless what you are about to say or do has a high probability for making things better, don't say it, and don't do it.  OR more simply stated by Thumper, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."

4- Where both the husband and wife are in the home, openly show affection to and for one another.  I always saw my parents give each other a kiss before my dad left for work and when he came home.  It gave me peace.  In a world where families are breaking all around, what better peace of mind can we give our children than the knowledge that their parents love each other?  


These rules sound a lot more like marital counseling than how to deal with an unruly child, but it's creating a happy FAMILY and that includes everyone.  These rules give ME something to change, to help ME do something to make myself and our home a more pleasant place to be.